Sunday, August 30, 2015

First person

Okay, so sorry for missing yesterday. Apologies all over the place.

That said, let's get to the point. An update:

I haven't written all that much this week, due to growing up and having to do college and all that. Sometimes growing up stinks because you don't always have time to do things you love the most. But, I did get a little smidgen of writing done on Once Upon a Fantasy and, after reading three first person stories in a row and doing an interview with Brenden (last week's post), I've decided that I think I like the story better in first person present. So, starting to revise all 20,000 words...yeah, it's taking a little time. But I'm enjoying it, because I love Annabelle so much better now. And plus, like I said in an earlier post, I realized that I have a whole bunch to add about Lyme that I was starting to think I couldn't do without a rewrite. So...here we go!

What's your favorite POV to write in? Tense? 

And...will you judge and tell me which is better, before I do the whole story this way. :)

New: 
            Sometimes I wish I could disappear.
            Sometimes I wish I could cry without looking like a cowardly idiot.
            Always I wish I didn’t have my life.
            I feel like I’ve been punched in the stomach by Dad, something he used to do frequently before he was arrested. I can’t breathe. I may as well have been running a mile, that’s how my voice comes out. “But he wasn’t supposed to be released until—”
            “I know,” Mom interrupts, covering my shaking hands. “They released him early. It shouldn’t be a problem.” She makes an effort to meet my eyes. I refuse to look at her.
            “He hates me.” My voice cracks a bit. I’m not going to cry.
            Mom pats my hands. “It’ll be okay, Annabelle. We’ll stay away from him and he’ll stay away from us. We have a restraining order. The police are protecting us. We’ll be okay.”
            I swallow against my closing throat. “You don’t understand.”

            “You’re perfectly safe, sweetheart.” She stands and grabs her briefcase from the tabletop. “I’m late for work. I’ll see you tonight, don’t worry about this. I love you.” She kisses my cheek and leaves me at the table, completely wrecked.

Original: 
            “Honey...your dad is...has been released from jail.” Mom made an obvious effort to meet Annabelle's eyes.
            Annabelle felt like she'd been punched in the stomach by Dad, something he used to do frequently before he was arrested. She couldn't breathe properly. She may as well have been running for a mile, that’s how her voice came out. “But he wasn’t supposed to be released until-”
            “I know,” she interrupted, setting the phone on the table and covered Annabelle's shaking hands. “They released him early. It shouldn't be a problem,” she said softly. The kitchen light cast shadows on her face.
            She wanted to cry. But she couldn't. Not here. “He hates me.” Her voice cracked a bit. She wasn't going to cry.
            Mom patted her hands. “It'll be okay, sweetheart. We'll stay away from him and he'll stay away from us. We have a restraining order. The police are protecting us. We'll be okay.”
            Annabelle swallowed against her closing throat. “You don't understand.”
            “You're perfectly safe, Annabelle.” She stood and grabbed her briefcase from the tabletop. “I'm late for work. I'll see you tonight. Don't worry about this. I love you.” She kissed Annabelle's cheek and left her at the table, feeling shell-shocked.

Saturday, August 22, 2015

Interview with Brenden

***Note: I'm planning on posting an update once a week, on Saturdays.

Okay, so...I've taken a little pause on Once Upon a Fantasy on accounts of the fact that school starts on Monday and I told my mom that I'd be finished editing Dawn by the end of the summer...Yikes. Still have 100 pages left to edit and I'm getting bored. That's never good, right? I suppose it's because I've read this scene half a million times because I love it so much and now I don't love it as much because I've read it a half a million times.

So, earlier last week I was feeling as though my characters needed to get to know each other better, so I conducted an interview. I'll paste the interview with Brenden and if you have any more questions for him, post them and I'll tell him to answer them for you. Have fun!

Okay, so let’s get some background. Give us your name, you’re age and where you go to school.

So, my name is Brenden Hollenby and I’m sixteen, almost seventeen. (I know that makes me sound like a toddler, rounding my age like that.) I go to school at Pine Creek High School in Colorado Springs.

Why do you think your parents named you what you did? Include your middle name as well.

Okay, so my middle name is David, and I think it means loved. At least that’s what my mom told me. She said that they named me this because Brenden means prince and Mom liked that because I’m a child of God and the name was symbolic to her.

Do you like your name?

Yes. I like the symbolism and plus it just fits me.

How would you describe yourself, personality wise?

That’s kind of a trick question, because it could end up sounding vain. *smiles* Okay, let’s see…I’m outgoing. I like talking to people and getting them to come out of their shells. It’s amazing what happens when you take the time to just talk to someone. I’m generally optimistic. Sometimes overly so. I like laughing…I can’t think of anything else at the moment.

You say you like to talk to people. Do you have any specific instances about people ‘coming out of their shells’ that stick out to you?

Most of my friends I actually met that way, but the one that sticks out to me most, is Annabelle. I’m convinced God put her in my path, because she really needed someone. She told me that she didn’t have any friends. Part of that was her fault, because she didn’t make the effort to talk to people. She claimed she couldn’t carry a conversation. But part of it was simply circumstance. She had anxiety, which made her afraid to meet new people and her dad was in prison which gave students the wrong impression about her. I’d actually noticed her before because she’s in a couple of my classes and she’s pretty. And I’m not ashamed to admit that I had a little crush on her. Not fully, because I didn’t really know her, but she was kind of pretty and smart, and super quiet, which really appealed to me, because, like I said, I like bringing people out of their shells. Anyway, I came into the school by a different door to avoid this girl who kept flirting with me. (Again, I’m convinced this was a God-thing, because that girl never gave me a second glance after that day.) I was going through the halls and I saw this guy from school named Conrad, yelling at Annabelle and calling her names, telling her she was ugly. She wasn’t saying anything, but she looked absolutely terrified and like she really wanted to say something. And I felt like God told me to go over and help her. It wasn’t like a voice or anything, just a very strong impression, which I’ve learned usually is God. So, I’m arguing with God in my head, like, seriously, God? I’m going to be late for class and I really don’t want to get in trouble. Conrad is hugely bigger than me and I’m pretty sure that if I get in a fight with him I’m going to epically lose. But, He kept pushing and so I finally did something, even though I was scared out of my wits. I wish I’d done something  sooner, because when I finally got up the courage, he’d tripped her and her books went everywhere and I’m pretty sure it hurt her tailbone as well, just judging by the way she fell. I basically diverted his attention away from her and told him to leave her alone, which sounded extremely cliché, but I didn’t exactly care. She looked up at me, like she totally didn’t expect for someone do anything about her situation. The look she gave me made me wonder how long she’d been bullied. I had to hit him, but I swear, it was in self-defense. Before he could do anything to either of us, I grabbed her elbow and led her away until I figured we were safe, since the hall was crowded with teachers as well as students. I asked her if she was okay, introduced myself and everything. It was an extremely brief conversation and right as the bell rang I remembered what Conrad had said about her being ugly and I told her she wasn’t ugly. It was extremely awkward, but that’s another thing about me. I tend to say awkward things, if it will improve the situation or benefit someone. It was awkward, but I said it and I’m pretty sure she had tears in her eyes as she thanked me. After that, I went out of my way to talk to her, fairly sure that God wanted me to. I just could sense that she needed someone to talk to. I didn’t have anyone else to talk to anyway. I mean, I had friends here and there, but none that specifically went out of their ways to talk to me. As time went on, she began to talk to me more about herself and her family and I began to see that she really had needed someone.

Why do you say that she really needed someone?

I didn’t learn until nearly eight months later, but her dad had been released out of jail the exact day I defended her. She told me that she had an anxiety attack later that day because of it and that me talking to her every day grounded her through everything that happened.

Did other things happen to her that she needed you for?

She got sick and was eventually diagnosed with Lyme disease which is a disease that you specifically have to fight with will. She told me that she wouldn’t have had enough fight in her to defeat the disease if it hadn’t been for me, which is totally awesome, since I was only doing what God had told me. And her dad began to stalk her, which was really creepy, but it freaked her out all the more and gave her anxiety which allows the Lyme to progress.

What is your favorite and least favorite characteristic that you possess?

Hmm….Favorite would probably be that I’m not afraid to talk to people and that brings a lot of adventures, I guess you’d say, and different cool stories. Least favorite is probably that I’m extremely afraid of sickness, like it’s probably one of my only fears. And I hate it because it makes it hard to act natural around people I love who are sick, which in turn makes them feel like an outcast, which I don’t want at all.

Did something happen that made you so afraid of sickness?

Yeah. So, it all happened at once in 2014. First it was my grandpa. So, he’d never been healthy, but he was real leery of doctors and the like. It wasn’t until he began to have severe pain that he went into the doctor and they found that he’d had cancer for years and it had progressed to far to do anything. He died at the beginning of the year within a month or so of his diagnosis. Second, I had a childhood friend, someone I’d known since we were like, three. We’d lost touch over the years and one day my mom told me that he had some sort of terminal disease. I got back in contact with him for maybe six months and really got to know him before he died. I hope I did something to encourage him in that time. And last was Jared. *Sigh* He…Him, me and Barry met in kindergarten and were basically best friends all the way through high school. We went on a missions trip to Africa. He was on a medication to keep him from getting sick, but he must have gotten a weird strain of malaria, because the medicine didn’t stop it. It attacked his brain and he died within a few days. It definitely wasn’t easy.

After that year did your faith falter at all?

Um…sort of, but not really. So, I never doubted the existence of God or his benevolence or any of that. I just didn’t understand why everything was happening and I wanted to see what God’s plan was and I couldn’t.

How did you deal with that question?

I talked to my parents…a lot. They told me some things that I actually ended up telling to Annabelle when she asked me the same question.

What did they tell you?

They told me the story of Joseph, where he had things happen to him for nearly seventeen years before he figured out what God’s plan was. So I’ve learned to be patient and trust God, even I can’t see what he’s doing.

Looking back over the past few years, have you been able to see a plan?

Somewhat. I believe God’s plans are complex enough that there are several reasons why any one thing happens. But I suppose I have seen different things that have resulted from his death. Annabelle, is one thing. I probably wouldn’t have met her if he’d still been alive, because we always walked to school together and we always got there early. We probably would have been in class before anything had happened with Annabelle. And even if I had been there when she was being bullied, I probably wouldn’t have noticed her. And even if I had noticed her and helped her, I probably wouldn’t have gone out of my way to talk to her, because I already had friends. We had all our breaks together.

What is your deepest regret?

That’s easy. The old family friend who died. I told you we got back in touch right before he died. I was always too afraid to tell him about what I believed and I wasn’t sure if he knew. He died and I was left wishing that I had the courage to at least make sure I knew what he believed.

What was his name?

Julian

Who do you value the most now? Why?

I love my family a lot, definitely. But outside of family, Annabelle. I’m actually planning on proposing to her after this. And why…do I need a reason to love someone?

No, I suppose not, but what about this? What qualities does she have that you admire?

As much as she told me she was a coward, she’s probably the bravest person I know. Having anxiety and being afraid doesn’t make you a coward. I mean, she went through her parents divorcing, her dad abusing her for five years, being bullied, getting Lyme disease and defeating it. She has aftereffects, sure, but she’s still living in a way she should be. She’s got the most adorable laugh. She is smart. She can cook really well. There are a lot more, but I think I’ll stop there, because I’ll go on forever. *smiles*

What kind of people annoy you the most? Why?


People think that they’re better than everyone else. Or people who hurt people just for fun. Or people who are completely detached from the world.

Anymore questions? Post them below! Or conduct your own interview and post it.


Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Blog Readers, These are the Gibsons

Okay, so I know I'm, like, the most horrible writer blogger, but I've got another blog that I devote most of my time and energy to. Click here, if you want to learn more. So, sorry to all my non-existant followers. (Actually, for your information, I've got a grand total of 2 followers and *coughcough* both of them are my sisters. Love you, Emma and Abby. ;) So, apologies aside, I'll start on what I actually came here to post.

In honor of an amazing couple from my former church, there has been a new twist in Once Upon a Fantasy.
Before I say anything, though, I want you to meet these people.


I'd like to introduce Tanner and Rebekah Gibson. Here is a little background on them:

Bekah has had Lyme disease since she was a baby, but never knew it until three years ago. She had just been unhealthy her whole life. She met Tanner and they got married. Four months later, Bekah's Lyme got worse, due to the stress of arranging a wedding. She went from doctor to doctor to specialist until she was finally diagnosed with Chronic Lyme Disease. She underwent treatment for around two years. The medicine caused her to develop a "herx reaction" which basically put the bacteria into her blood stream and gave her a lot of terrible symptoms. Through a series of antibiotics and painful symptoms as well as emotional symptoms, and a couple of moments when she thought she wasn't going to make it, through prayer she pulled through. Tanner has Lyme as well, and is currently responding well to treatment. I actually don't know a lot about him, since I just learned of his diagnosis. This story is so so so complicated and you can read all of it here, on Bekah's blog.

So, needless to say, they've inspired me. My character is going to go through Chronic Lyme Disease - which is a very controversial disease, as many doctors won't treat it. Google it. :) - to help raise awareness for this and hopefully help the many other people with this disease identify with Annabelle and let them know they're not alone...that is if I ever get to publishing it, which will be my goal. I like this story better than my last six. A lot better.

So, Once Upon a Fantasy, is currently under major construction, because I wrote half the book before I interviewed Bekah and figured out that I had several MAJOR points wrong. I'm getting there, though. Pray that I can get through this stage and that this story will inspire people!