Pain and Suffering

I've found that I can discover key things about my characters through the way they handle pain. Now this may seem completely obvious, but I'm going to give you an example anyway, between my main character, Aura, and her younger brother Ray.
When the story starts, Aura's boyfriend, Chris, dies in a car crash. Ray was driving the car at the time it crashed, so he feels responsibility. So each of them have sufficient suffering that I put them through. *evil writer cackle* They each handled their pain in different ways.

Aura yelled at God, got another job, refused to think about Chris and basically shunned anything that reminded her of her pain.
Ray started doing drugs and did anything in his power to make his pain go away and got angry and defensive when anyone told him he shouldn't be doing what he is.

So, here's what I learned through observing these things:
Aura: 

1. She's a person who believes on just pushing through.
2. She's a person who wants to blame someone for her pain.
3. She believes that forgetting and ignoring what hurts her is the solution to her problem 

Ray: 

1. He's a problem solver.
2. He doesn't like being told what to do.
3. He believes that he doesn't need help and that he can do everything on his own. 

I just thought this was interesting. I figured this out after I'd written half the story and it helps shape their character. Try it!

And, one more thing: I'm ecstatic! I found a song that perfectly sums up the lie Ray believes. It does have a lot of screaming in it, so if you don't like that, don't listen to it. It's called Damage by Red.

Now the damage is done. I can't escape, can't run, can't undo what I've done. All I do is damage...It's destroying me...I'm sick of the misery...I am human debris....I'm a catastrophe. Take this away. It was just a mistake. Save me.